Boats, Busses and Trams

Thursday, September 17, 2015

This was a day at sea in which we traveled from Barcelona to Naples. We needed the time to relax after many successive days of touring various places.

Friday, September 18, 2015

This day was something like planes, trains and automobiles – only it was Boats, Buses and Trams.

We docked at Naples (or Napoli as the locals say) in the early morning. We had a full day tour scheduled – the Isle of Capri, Sorrento and then Pompeii. While we were just about ready to disembark, Steve could not find his cruise ship ID card. At that point, Tim also noted that he had forgot his card. So both ran back to their rooms with Tim retrieving his card and Steve finding his card in his pocket where it had been all along. They raced down to the disembarkation deck and made it to the consternation of the ship crew who were waiting on us. Nonetheless, we got off on schedule at 8AM.

OK, what follows was something like the marine boot camp.

We got off the ship, and promptly walked a half mile to the dock where we were to catch our ferry to Capri. There we had to wait for our tour guide, who had to wait in a line to get tickets for all of us to board the ferry. Then we got in long line to board the ferry and were herded on board to get in line to go up the steps to find seating, of which there was very little. The ferry took 40 minutes to get to Capri, and disembarkation from the ferry was chaos. Multiple ferries from multiple cruise lines were crowding every inch of the pier. Furthermore, as we pushed our way off the pier to the main street of the port area, there were thousands of people crowding the main street. We had to wait for our tour guide to get tickets for the tram that went up to the town square of Capri. Once we had the tickets we had to wait in a long line with 500 of our “closest tourist friends” to get on the tram. At that point Tim gave up and did a self-guided tour of the small town at the harbor. For the rest of us, it took 45 minutes to reach the top of the town.

Now I must say that the view from the actual town of Capri was very, very cool. However, we only had about 30 minutes to look around Capri. So it was now about 12:30, and we had spent 4 hours in some form of transportation or queueing for transportation and 30 minutes of sightseeing. Chan, Michele, Steve and Debbie agreed that Tim made best choice as he wandered the little harbor side village.

When we returned to the harbor, we waited to get our next set of tickets for the hydrofoil to Sorrento. After we got those tickets, we were instructed to go to Pier 13 to wait for our 1PM trip. Did I mention the temperatures were now up to 95, and the sun was very intense, and patience was wearing thin? So, we trucked all the way out to the end of the pier and waited and waited and waited until the hydrofoil finally showed up at 1:30. Did I mention how rude European tourists are? They all forget what the learned in kindergarten and unabashedly push their way to the front of the line at every opportunity. There were particularly egregious examples on Pier 13.

After getting to Sorrento, we disembarked from the hydrofoil (remember it’s still 95) and waited for our tour guide who had to wait in a line to get tickets for us for the bus, as we waited in line to get on the bus. The bus trucked us up the rocky hillside to the center of town in Sorrento where we ate a very nice and well-deserved lunch. By the time we were done, we were left with about 10 minutes of sightseeing Sorrento, then it was back to waiting for our bus.

From Sorrento we traveled by bus to Pompeii (remember, it’s still 95 degrees and Europeans do not ascribe to the theory of air conditioning or cold things in general (e.g. drinks, including milk). When we got to Pompeii, we had to wait while our tour guide got our tickets and then we marched through the ancient ruin. This was actually a cool tour, but we were pretty frazzled since it was very late afternoon. I won’t go into all the cool things about Pompeii, but it was a difficult walking tour since the stone streets were very uneven.

Our tour guide was very, very Italian and proud of all things Italian and Roman. He didn’t seem to mind the time very well, and he wanted to tell us everything he could about Pompeii. Even though the tour was supposed to be done at 5:00PM so we could get back to the ship at 5:30 (the ‘all aboard’ time for the ship was 6:30 with departure at 7:00), our tour guide was still going strong leading us through Pompeii at 6 o’clock. We made it back to the ship at about 6:55PM and our tour group was the last to be onboard. Through it all, our tour guide was unfazed.

Our day of boats, busses and trams was a lot of travel time and a little sightseeing. What we saw was very cool, but we vowed that the next time we would not be so ambitious with seeing multiple sight in one excursion.

Our day ended with dinner, lounging around and watching Chan try to drink as much as he could so he could use up his pre-bought, unlimited drink package.

The Basilica and The Walk

Wednesday, September 16, 2015

We docked in Barcelona and had planned our own tour – a visit to the famous La Sagrada Familia (The Holy Family) Basilica and a hop-on/hop-off bus tour.

By far, the highlight of Barcelona and perhaps of the entire trip was Sagrada Familia. We had a guided tour for one hour and then some time on our own at the Basilica. There is not enough space to describe the unique and spectacular nature of this church, but I will give it a few sentences.

·       It was designed by Antoni Gaudi and started in1882 (Note: it is still under construction with expected completion date in 2026 – the 100 year anniversary of Gaudi’s death.

·       The basilica has three facades – Nativity, Ascension and the Glory (which will be the front of the church). Each façade has dozens of sculptures built into its enormous (75-100 feet high) and magnificent entry – each with scenes for the birth of Christ (Nativity) and the death and resurrection of Christ (Ascension). The Glory façade is barely underway, but we saw sketches that Gaudi had done over 100 years ago that show how exceedingly magnificent it will be.

·       Upon entering through the nativity façade, one is immediately struck by brilliant – and I mean brilliant – stained glass windows. The next thing that strikes you is the soaring height of the basilica – one of the highest in the world. The next thing that strikes you is that the gigantic pillars of the basilica are not anything like what you see in a traditional cathedral. They are meant to be more like very tall trees with arching branches and foliage at the top to support the roof.

·       The choir loft seats 1000 people.

It is simply impossible to describe in this short note – or perhaps in any written form. It has to be seen to be experienced … and it is truly an extraordinary experience. I would encourage anyone to go on-line and see pictures even if though can only do partial justice.

We ate a delightful, outdoor lunch on the Place de John F. Kennedy. We did our hop-on/hop-off tour, and got off near the port. Our enormous ship could be seen easily and we decided to walk to it from the bus tour drop off point. You know how really big mountains look close to you, but you end up driving for hours before you reach them? Well, really big cruise ships look closer than they actually are, and a two mile walk later, we were back on board our ship.

As we walked the streets of Barcelona, we all had the feeling of a more modern city, very well planned with wide streets and orderly traffic. There was so much more to do and see in Barcelona, but alas, we had to proceed to our next port of call.

The Pearls and The Bullfight

Tuesday, September 15, 2015

Our next port of call was the city of Palma on the island of Majorca, better known as Palma de Majorca. It is part of Spain. Again, the port area was beautiful as it was lined with high-end condo buildings and plenty of fancy yachts in the harbor.

This was a very pleasant surprise as we took the city tour. There are three areas of note – the world famous pearls (especially black pearls), the bull fighting ring and, yes, another huge 14^th century cathedral. [We have lost track of our cathedral count and chapel count at this point.] The cathedral has been updated in more modern times, including some stained glass by Antoni Gaudi as well as a highly decorative ring of 33 lanterns suspended over the altar. It was a preview of things to come when we docked in Barcelona.

Again, we had an easy bus trip back to the ship. We had dinner, some drinks and a show.

The Rich and The Famous

Monday, September 14, 2015

Our second port of call was Cannes, France. This is definitely where the elite meet to eat. The yachts were incredible and the entire waterfront was lined with high priced condos. Our excursions were to visit a small mountain top town called Eze and then on to Monaco (the second smallest country on the planet). We were keeping a watch for Robin Leach as we felt we were in an episode of “Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous.”

The short story is that Eze is a very small, fortified town built in the 13^th century. The street are ultra-small (no cars allowed in this town – they simply would not fit). The current population of the town is 18.

The Principality of Monaco (yes, it is ruled by a Prince) can be seen in one glance from the hillsides overlooking this country. Interestingly, the country of Monaco has 4 cities in it – one being the famous Monte Carlo with its gambling and Grand Prix event. The scenery around Monaco is very, very nice. It is actually nestled at the base of the French Alps which go right into the seas at Monaco. From one elevated vantage point in Monaco you can see building on one side of a street that are in Monaco and the other side of the street, the buildings are in France. Just off in the distance a little way you can also see Italy!

The trip back to our ship was very scenic, and the day ended with a nice dinner onboard and a show in the theater (which seats 1600 people by the way).

The Cancellation and The Announcements

Sunday, September 13, 2015

Our tour of Cinque Terra was cancelled due to rough seas, so we took an alternative trip to Pisa – of leaning tower fame. The weather was threatening most of the morning and the skies were gray as we walked through the city gates to see the magnificent cathedral, baptistery and world famous leaning tower. Our tour guide spoke English but every English word ended in “a” or “o.” “Come-a to-a da cathedral-o and-a see-o de-a beautiful-a example of-a gothic-a architecture-o.” You get the point.

Wandering street vendors were hawking their usual touristy stuff, including umbrellas for 5€. Tim assured us that his ‘weather bug’ app said no rain until the afternoon (it was about 10:30 at this point). We were standing in front of the cathedral (along with 1000 other tourists) listening to our tour guide explain some history when we heard thunder. Tim and Chris brought rain gear, Steve and Debbie had one umbrella, Chan and Michele put too much trust in the weather forecast.

It started raining and Michele joined Steve and Debbie under the small umbrella. Chan couldn’t fit, and some vendor offered him an umbrella for 5€, but he noted confidently, “I’ve played golf in worse than this.” Within minutes, the rain was coming down very hard, and Chan was getting soaked along with many other tourist. The price of umbrellas was now 7€. We ended up buying some because it was just raining too hard.

Interestingly, hundreds of tourist were converted to Catholicism at that moment as they rushed into the cathedral to go to Mass. This included Chan. Mathematically speaking, Chan’s interest in seeing the cathedral increased exponentially as precipitation increased. Chan was asking, nay begging, for a priest in the back of the church so he could confess and convert. By the time the priest arrived, the rain slowed to a drizzle and Chan’s conversion fizzled, so he left the safety of the cathedral. So much for cheatin’ Chan’s conversion.

We ended up in a Burger King (it’s true) and we went for the blow dryers, each of us taking turns directing hot air on our shirts and pants. You have to imagine Chan turned backwards and sideways to the blow dryer, trying to get dried off. You also have to imagine that the blow dryers are motion activated – which is no big deal when drying your hands – and the backwards dance Chan was doing to keep the blower activated was well worth the price of buying something from Burger King so we could stay indoors. Just close your eyes and imagine that.

The evening was a chance for us to go to our first show on the ship after dinner. What caught us by surprise was that every announcement/introduction was done in six languages - English, Italian, French, Spanish, German, and Russian. Sometimes it seemed like even more. It takes forever to introduce the show. With so many versions of introductions, the master of ceremonies spoke extremely fast. So, ironically, in trying to communicate to everyone, he most likely was communicating to no one. We certainly could not understand his English, especially since he speak the Italiano version of Ingleso.

The Museum and The Gelato Stop

Saturday, September 12, 2105

We had a casual morning where each couple did their own thing. Can you guess what that was for each couple?

              Tim & Chris:                     Off to the laundry to clean clothes for the cruise

              Chan & Michele:             Off to do more shopping

              Steve & Debbie:              Visit the Galileo Museum

Sounds about right, doesn’t it? There are two noteworthy comments here.

1)      Tim sweet talked a girl at the nearby laundromat into doing his laundry for the second leg of the trip. The whole scenario brought back memories of Tim’s Notre Dame days.

2)      About the Galileo Museum. Steve and Debbie got to the entrance (there was no crowd for one) and found that the entry fee was 8€ per person. WE didn’t have much time and Debbie was suggesting that I go in and get my science fix while she waited outside. Steve didn’t like the idea and there were no benches or any place for Debbie to sit. At that very moment a women was going into the museum and asked if she could help up. We said we were debating whether both of us should go in or not. She said, “You should go in. It is well worth it.” We explained about Debbie’s visual impairment and not wanting to waste 8€, blah, blah, blah. The women, Karen, said, “Well since she is visually impaired, she gets in free and you, Steve, get in free as her escort!” It turns out that this women 9who was American) was one of the curators of the museum. She told the people at the front desk about the situation, and the next thing you know, Debbie and I are getting our own private tour of the Galileo Museum. There was lots of cool stuff inside for die-hard math-types, including the actual telescopes Galileo used to spot the moons of Jupiter and provide visual evidence that the earth is not the center of the solar system (which was heresy back in those days).

Anyway, it was our day to drive from Florence to the port where our cruise started. This was Civitivecchi, just about 40 miles north of Rome. When we met our driven, he immediately stated, “No Inglesé.” Steve sat in the front seat this time, and we were on a mission to get the best gelato in all of Florence, which we knew was on the way we had to go. Steve was able to communicate that we wanted to stop just over the bridge at the gelato shop. With some gestures and spelling and careful pointing, our driver got it! We got over the bridge and across the busy street, and in true Italian fashion he just stopped the van right on the street corner. We piled out, got our gelato (it was very good), and got on our way. Later on the 3 hour drive, Steve was able to gesticulate “toilettes” at which point our driver understood and said “peet-a stop-a.” We all said, “Si!”

We arrived at Civitavecchia and boarded the ship without incidence.

The Driver and The Dinner

Friday, September 11, 2015

The plan for the day was to go to the Uffizi Gallery, one of the great art museums of the world. We had a voucher that was supposed to give us ‘skip the line’ access to the museum. As we approached the Uffizi on our walk from our hotel, there were incredibly long lines around the museum. We were thrilled with the fact that we had the ‘skip the line’ access … until we learned that we had to redeem the voucher for the tickets before we could skip the line to enter the museum. The problem was the line for tickets was of hundreds of people long and we apparently did not have ‘skip the line’ ticket access. Our assessment was that we would spend a huge amount of time in line just to get our tickets, so we abandoned ship. Who wants to see a bunch of great paint by number canvases from the Renaissance anyway?

So we decided to get inside the famed Basilica (the Duomo) and have a look around. Entrance was free!! Just get in line and walk in! The line seemed long (so what else is new), and there were salespeople trying to sell us a tour that would allow us to (you guessed it) ‘skip the line’ and get a guided tour. We balked on two offers, and just got in line, which was a great move since the line moved very fast and we only waited 5-10 minutes to get in.

The Basilica, which is so beautifully intricate on the outside, was pretty plain on the inside, except for the dome. It is huge and cavernous, but the walls are pretty plain. The dome is exquisitely painted with a view of Mary in Heaven. After 30 minutes there, we went to see another famous church (they are everywhere) called Santa Croce or Holy Cross. Except for Steve, the group had done enough churching, and the ladies wanted to do some shopping in the local markets on the piazza in front of Santa Croce. Tim and Chan sat patiently by and watched the women be gatherers as they collected various items (Note: Florence is famous for fine leather goods). They thought that watching spouses shop was the lesser of two evils, but when Steve returned, Tim and Chan wished they had gone into the church. Note that Santa Croce is steeped with history and culture – it is the final resting place of Michelangelo, Galileo, Machiavelli, Rossini, (maybe) Dante, Fermi and Marconi (of radio making fame). It is also a strikingly beautiful church in its own way with many side altars.

In mid-afternoon, we were picked up to go to a rural vineyard (Santo Stefano) where we would learn some Tuscan cooking recipes and would make our own meal. The drive was about 45 minutes from downtown Florence where we stayed. Alessandro was at the wheel once again. The place was remote enough to not be on a Garmin map. It’s never a good sign when your surgeon or your drivers says, “Oops.” Alessandro turned up a very narrow road on a very steep hill. Within 100 yards, the road became gravel and within another two hundred yards it was dirt. We felt like we were four wheeling, except we were in an 8 passenger Mercedes van! We were bouncing through ruts and doing 180 degree switchbacks up the hill while Debbie and Michele had their heads down not wanting to see what was just over the edge of the road. After 5 minutes of jostling, shaking, bouncing, Alessandro told us 3 more kilometers (i.e. two miles). We had gone another 4 kilometers, and that’s when the “Oops” popped out. We had taken the wrong dirt road up the wrong hill. Alessandro pointed to a farmhouse and winery on the next hillside from where we were and noted, “That’s-a where-a we want-a to be-a.” Alessandro retraced his path back down the hill, drove on the main road about 100 yards, and then we started the same trek up to Santo Stefano – jostling, shaking and bouncing all the way.

OK, I will make this concise. When we got to the hilltop farmhouse/winery, the views were spectacular. We got a tour of the cellars and the wine making process. After doing some wine-tasting, we proceeded to the kitchens to make our own meal from scratch with an expert Tuscan chef. The most memorable part of the experience was the look on Chan’s face when he saw Michele cooking dinner … on vacation nonetheless – talk about a miracle!  BTW: the ever-quiescent Chan asked us … “Do you know how Michele calls the family to dinner?” Answer: “Alright, everybody in the car!” Michele did draw the line at doing dishes.

While dinner was cooking, we noticed the sun going down behind the Tuscan hillsides, and we grabbed a few classic pictures before enjoying the fruits of our culinary labors (Note: we made our own sea shell-like pasta from scratch among other things). The food and the wine was very good, including dessert. We even invited Alessandro to join us for dinner, and he enjoyed that.

The story is almost over. We jostled, shook and bounced our way down the dirt and gravel road for 10 minutes, and then Alessandro got on the main road. It was pretty late by the time we got back to Piazza Santa Maria Novella. We gave Alessandro a nice tip, and then he said we had to pay an extra 50€ since we took an hour longer than scheduled. This is the guy who went the wrong way and then ate dinner with us!

In the end, we all agreed that we had just purchased another VERY memorable experience.

The Drive and the Countryside

Thursday, September 10, 2015

Today was our tour of the Tuscan countryside – first to San Gimingano and then to Siena. Our driver was Alexander (from Australia) who moved to Italy 40 years ago at a very young age and took the name Alessandro. He spoke with a heavy Italian accent (keep that in mind for what follows).

Tim sat in the front seat while the rest of us piled into the back. There was a lively conversation from the start in that front seat. Despite the language barrier, Tim and Alessandro were chatting like best friends in a matter of 5 miles. Those of us in the back could not help but listen in and at times chuckle about the exchanges of Alessandro speaking and Tim saying, “Huh?” At one point, Alessandro was talking about his daughter, and when Tim asked how old she was, Alessandro responded with what sounded like, “Six – tee.” Tim’s incredulous response was, “What?!?! Sixty?” Now Alessandro was an older guy, but it even took Tim by surprise. What followed was a sequence of Alessandro saying something with the number six in it, and Tim questioning back, “six – zero?” or “sixteen?” (with excessive emphasis on the “n”) or “one-six?” Alessandro kept saying “six … something.” After several back and forths, Alessandro gets out his wallet (while driving down the highway) and fumbles through the wallet until he produces a picture of a little girl who looks about 6. In the end, those of us in the back seat were never really sure whether the picture was his daughter or grand-daughter and whether she was 6 or 16.

Alessandro also was sharing his interests (and pictures) which seem to focus mostly on flying airplanes. At one point, Alessandro even mentioned flying in a “Baaloo.” Tim responded “What?” Alessandro and Tim continued the exact same exchange several times – Alessandro “Baaloo” and Tim “What!?” Michele was in the back seat about to burst and tell Tim that Alessandro was saying “balloon.” Just before she burst, Alessandro and Tim made the connections and there was an audible sigh from the five of us in the back seat.

With the driving antics out of the way, let me say it straight away – if you ever have the chance to go to San Gimingano, you must go! It is a an absolutely beautiful 14^th century town, just like you might envision – narrow stone streets, some churches, perched on a hilltop overlooking a broad colorful valley filled with vineyards and olive groves. Unfortunately, we were there only one hour and we could have spent several hours there.

We left there for lunch at a vineyard nearby – Fattoria Poggio Alloro. We got off the main road (and “road” is a generous description), and turned on to a gravel road that was even narrower. Just when we thought the scenery in Tuscany could not get any better, we were stunned as we were escorted to the back of the farmhouse. There was our table with a stunning view of the valley but looking up the hillside back to the walled city of San Gimingano in all its glory. We had a leisurely lunch, which was great since we could not stop staring at the view.

We went on to Siena, a larger city but still with many features from many years ago including Roman times. After all of our travels, we needed a toilette stop (as they say in Italy) and found a public restroom. The attendant therein was a bit slovenly and was making sure everyone deposited their 50 cent piece in the turn style. When the turn style got jammed, the attendant made sure that it was working again. Once the guys got out, Chan and Steve were quick to point out to Tim that this was the type of job Tim could do in retirement (Tim is looking to stay busy these days). Tim readily agreed but noted he needed more education. He noted that when he got back to the US he would look into some correspondence courses on bathroom management.

What have we learned by now is the following:

·       If you are buying Chianti that doesn’t have a black rooster on the label somewhere, then you are not buying authentic Chianti.

·       Gelato is God’s gift to Italy (less fat and less sugar – more filling, tastes great) and Italy’s gift to us.

·       The average European or at least the average tourist in Europe doesn’t understanding queuing theory – that is, forming a line and following one behind another in their proper turn. All such thoughts are null and void. People just jump ahead in the line when they want something.

·       Every church was built in the 14^th century or earlier. Anything after the 14^th century is considered new.

·       Our church count is now up to 27 and the chapel count is well over 100.

The Restaurant and the Cathedral

Wednesday, September 9, 2015

Today was our travel day from Rome to Florence (about 3 hour drive). The Italian country-side as we drove through Tuscany was stunningly beautiful. It is dotted with little town perched atop large hills or small mountains, many of which were built in the 13^th-14^th century.

We arrived in Florence, and let me tell you, the streets are NARROW! Our mini-van barely fit on the streets, and the side mirrors could easily pick off pedestrians on the very narrow sidewalks as well. People walk in the streets in central Florence, which are blocked off to most traffic. Thousands of people are walking between churches, museums and other points of interest and jumping up and down off the curbs as necessary. Amazingly, it all seems to work.

We stayed on a beautiful square – Piazza Santa Maria Novella – where the new St. Mary’s church was standing. It is about 500 years old! This is in contrast to the old St. Mary’s church (the new church was built over the top of the old church) which dates back well over a 1000 years ago. After we checked into the hotel, we piled onto the elevator (again, I cannot tell you how small the elevators are). The sign said “Maximum Capacity – 8 Persons (or 5 Americans),” and sure enough … when Tim got on the elevator last, the warning system started beeping and the digital sign was flashing “OVERLOAD.” Really! I am serious. Tim had to get off and take the stairs!

We went to the closest street side restaurant on the piazza outside our hotel. You know you live in a global economy when 6 Americans are in Italy at an Italian restaurant, our waitress is oriental, she is wearing French designer jeans, she takes our order in English while we listen to Spanish music. Incredible. We are one people on one planet participating on one economy. No one wins until we all win. There was some good humor at this street-side restaurant; some sampling of the signs there:

              “MEN – no shirt, no shoes, no service. WOMEN – no shirt, free drinks.”

              “I like to use wine when cooking; I even use it in the recipe on occasion.”

              “ FREE food and beer … tomorrow.”

While waiting for our order, Chan tells us he did karaoke in college (Butler). Debbie says to Chan, “Hey, look! There is a karaoke machine back there.” Chan says, “Where?” And then we all told Chan never fall for it when DEBBIE says to look at something … but ironically, Debbie was right … they had a karaoke machine! We never got Chan to do any karaoke, so for now, his karaoke expertise is still hypothetical.

We had a walking tour of Florence, which is much, much smaller than Rome. We got a lot of history of Florence and got to see some of the sites. Of worthy note, we saw the 18 foot statue of David sculpted by Michelangelo as well as the Cathedral Basilica Santa Maria del Fiore. It is an incredible structure, one of the largest Catholic churches in the world. There is a huge dome that has a long story that goes with it, but suffice to say that in our current times with our current technology, we would struggle to build this dome. That fact that it was done 500 years ago makes it simply astounding.

We walked along the Arno River to a restaurant that was recommended by Tim’s sister – Il Profeta. We all agreed that it was a spectacular dining experience. How spectacular do you ask? Michele was actually licking the plate of their home made secret sauce that covered her pasta. Embarrassing but true – we have the picture. Our waiter said not to be worried about this since JohnTravolta had been in the restaurant recently and did the same thing! Our waiter, Martino, was very engaging. After a spectacular meal, Martino went around the table, saying, “Here is something to remember us by, and here is something to remember us by …” he was handing out business cards to each of us – Michele, Chan, Debbie, Steve, Chris, and then he came to Tim and continued, “Here’s is something you will never forget” as he handed Tim the bill. He must have thought Tim was our father!!! Anyway, if you are ever in Florence, go to Il Profeta.

The Spot and The Lunch

Tuesday, September 8, 2015

Did I tell you about how small the elevators are in our hotel (and most European hotels in general)? How small are they you might ask? With his heels against one side wall of the elevator, Tim’s size 15 shoes barely fit across the elevator! And they are only about 6 feet deep. Because they are slow, we are routinely putting all 6 of us on one elevator, although there are times when it is difficult to get Tim in, and he has to take the stairs up one flight.

The motto for the day of our tour of the Vatican was “carpe spotto” – for those of you who have watched Dead Poet’s Society you will recognize this as “conquer the spot.” Our tour guide, Ricardo, took us on a tour of the Vatican Museum, the Sistine Chapel and St. Peter’s Basilica with 1,000,000 of our closest friends from around the world. Each time we arrived at a spot/opening with no people, he would run to the spot and gather us for his mini-lecture. We had a thorough tour with lots of history from Ricardo, sometimes more than we cared to know. The Vatican Museum has about 10 miles of galleries … and that only represents 20% of their holdings. Of course, the Sistine Chapel is amazing and there is a river of people passing through there on a continuous basis. It is actually a pretty small place – after all, it is a chapel. St. Peter’s Basilica is large and amazing in many, many ways. The most notable piece of art is the Pieta by Michelangelo, recognized by many as the greatest piece of sculpture in the history of art. After our tours, we had the driver drop us off at a restaurant that he recommended at the Piazza di Popolo.

We learned that lunch on a popular square in Rome is more about the view than the food or service. The waiter at Rosati’s didn’t seem interested in speaking English or helping with the menu [maybe his shorts were in a serious bunch!], which had items such as “small sandwich” and “pizza.” Any questions from us led to very curt responses and a wave of the hand. Apparently after one question, and unbeknownst to Chris, she ordered the “stuffed sandwich.” The waiter kept walking away and we weren’t sure what he was doing. As it turned out, each time someone ordered something, he went away to put in the order. We realized all this when the waiter showed up with a Costco-sample-sized sandwich with one layer of ham and one thin slice of cheese. Chris said, “What’s this? Where’s the rest of my sandwich?” thinking it was perhaps a sample. Michele caught the moment on film (or on silicon as the case may be), which shows Chris with an astonished expression as the waiter stepped back. The rest of our drinks and food came out a little bit at a time as we ordered and we were never really sure what was about to arrive. Chris re-ordered a “club sandwich,” which eventually came with tuna, salmon, egg between two dry pieces of toast … and Chris doesn’t even like fish!!! What I do know is that two 10 oz. Cokes cost more than 3 sandwiches for the Rubergs, the total bill being 35€. We all had a lot of laughs during lunch as we tried to interact with the waiter.

We did some self-directed touring of other areas of Rome, eating gelato, seeing more amazing basilicas and churches, fountains and Roman architecture. We got back to the hotel and decided to eat there in the Rose Garden restaurant. We had some drinks before dinner, and believe it or not, we also got complimentary Pringles with our drinks. Turns out this is considered a delicacy in Rome! We had a GREAT meal, and the mere fact that we had only to go up one flight of stairs to get to our rooms was and added bonus.

The Parthenon and The Experience

Monday, September 7, 2015

We met our tour guide for the day, Salvadore, at 9AM to begin the Imperial Rome Tour and the Walking City Tour. From the outset, I will note that Salvadore was spectacular. He was knowledgeable, engaging, attentive to our questions and passionate about what he is doing. He loves to explain things and teach us about Rome and all the sight we were seeing.

Our first stop was the Flavian Amphitheater, better known to commoners as the Coliseum. I could go on for a long time about how amazing and large this structure is, but I will keep it brief and get to the most interesting point at the end. It seated 65-75,000, had toilet facilities, had vendors walking around selling wine and bread and had 64 portals for entry and exit. Each patron reserved a seat for free and received a stone ticket with the portal entry number. The inaugural celebration lasted 100 days and went for 24 hours per day. There were 4000 gladiators and 9000 animals that died in the various games/battles over the course of those 100 days. There is also a stroke of genius that the Romans invented with this Coliseum – the sky box. The Emperor had one at the middle of the arena, and directly across from the Emperor was one for the vestal virgins.

We saw the Roman Forum and learned its history; saw where St. Peter was imprisoned while in Rome; saw the National monument celebrating the unification of Italy and the official beginning of Italy as a country that we know today. Amazing, Italy as the country we know today was only formed in 1861 – younger than the US! The Italians have a long history of difficulty getting themselves organized.

We had lunch on the Pizza Nuvona – what the Italians call calzone, which is nothing more than a pizza folded in half. We also experienced our first $7 Coke (a 10 oz. bottle nonetheless!). There are three large fountains on a large plaza. We continued our walking tour after lunch with Salvadore.

Our first stop was the Pantheon (pan = many; theos = gods) [Note: For the commoners, this is NOT the Parthenon as in Athens]. It started as a Roman temple (built 2000 years ago), but was converted to a Christian church at the fall of the Roman Empire. It is the largest dome in the world (by some measures), and you may know about it because they ran out of concrete and left a big hole at the top (actually, this was be design). The Romans made one enormous set of forms out of wood for the inner and outer walls, and then it was a single, continuous pour of concrete for about 100 days (eat your heart out John Zehner!!). By the way, for you art lovers, Raphael, the very famous Renaissance artist and architect, is buried there.

We went to the best coffee shop in Rome and our tour guide, Salvadore, was so proud to bring us there. Unfortunately, none of us drink coffee … but alas, Chan and Michelle noted that they could become coffee drinkers if they had such coffee to drink on a regular basis. We went to the Basilica San Ignazio di Loyola. It is hailed as the greatest example of artistic illusion because it has flat ceilings, but it looks like the ceilings are rounded arches and that there is actually a very high dome. We next went to the Trevi Fountain, often described as the most beautiful fountain in the world (sculpted by Bernini and it is very large) … but it was shut down due to restoration. So, we saw the fabulous design, but there was no flowing water … much to our chagrin. We asked for a refund from the Department of Tourism in Italy, but we are still waiting for an answer to our appeal. Their initial response was like all things in Italy – we will get back to you next year.

The rest of the afternoon went well, and Salvadore wants to come to the United States so he can vote. He and many European our pretty disgruntled with the lack of US involvement and leadership in the Middle East.

There was a secluded restaurant on the Piazza San Ignazio that got the recommendation of Salvadore, so we returned for dinner there. It was very authentic Italian and the waiter noted that, “I will give you  splendid dining experience.” He then offered, “I bring some appetizers to share.” We decided to go with the flow and ‘have the experience’ so we agreed. Nine dishes, a bottle of wine and 1 hour and 15 minutes later, we told him to call off the appetizers and bring us a dinner menu. We were so full that we ordered small dinners and another bottle of wine. Of course, we saved room for some desserts. When we got the bill after a 2 hours and 30 minute meal, it came on a scratch pad piece of note paper that was dropped on the table:

60

58

34

16

20

188 !!

Tim took one look, and asked for an explanation, but the waiter had already turned away. A little later, Tim tried to get the waiter’s attention as he walked by and ask for an explanation, but the waiter walked by without stopping. Tim was now on a mission. When the waiter walked by the next time, Tim asked for an explanation and the waiter turned away only to be grabbed (tactfully I might add) by Tim, who asked a bit sternly for a more detailed description of the bill. The waiter tersely pointed to each number and said, “Appetizers, wine, dinner, desserts, gratuity. I give the experience and tell you the number; you pay the bill!” Then he walked away, and we paid the bill.

It was a bit of a long walk to our hotel at about 10PM. We had to walk up many steps, then we walked up a hill to get to the hill we had to walk up to get to our hotel. It is said that Rome was built on seven hills; we have walked up at least eight.

The Lawyer and The Bus Ride

Sunday, September 6, 2015

We met for breakfast at 8AM, went through the buffet and proceeded to the outdoor seating area of the restaurant. There we saw it … the rose garden. Very nice! During breakfast, Chan got up the gumption to ask about the Jackie O Ristorante. We learned that a famous American used to come to the US Embassy and eat there - Jackie Onassis. Why didn’t we think of that!!

The plan for the day was to travel to Assisi (of St. Francis fame) to tour the old medieval city and check out some of the stuff related to St. Francis (from whom our current Pope took his name). Our driver, Lorenzo picked us up at 9:15 – right on time. Now, for what follows, please keep in mind that Lorenzo does not speak much English.

We piled in the Mercedes van – five of us getting into the two bench seats in the back and long-legged Tim requesting to sit in the front seat. We had just started around the block and Tim was noticeably fidgety in the front seat. As we talked, Tim finally asked Lorenzo to pull, and those of us in the back seats started to get involved in what was happening. Tim was saying that his seat was wet (apparently Depends isn’t as reliable as one would have thought) and Lorenzo was offering to put his seat back further. This confusing dialogue – Lorenzo offering to turn down the air-conditioning, Tim saying “Stop”; Lorenzo offering Tim water, Tim saying in Spanish “My seat is wet;” Lorenzo saying there is no rain today, Tim saying “Pull over” – continued for a little while with those of us in the back seat laughing hysterically as Tim squirmed in the front seat. Finally, when we stopped at a light, Tim started to open the door and Lorenzo was having a heart attack telling and motioning Tim to stay in the van. When Lorenzo pulled over, Tim jumped out of the front seat fanning the back of his shorts. When Lorenzo finally understood, he apologized and Tim piled in the back seat with us. Of course, we all gave him a hard time and laughed for the next 10 miles at Tim’s expense.

Now, you might think this story is over, but half way to Assisi, we pulled over for a bathroom break. By the time Steve got to the restroom, Tim was standing backwards under the hand dryer letting the air go down his pants. That was quite a sight !!

It was a very nice day in Assisi, albeit too short. The weather was fantastic. We visited the Basilicas of St. Clare and St. Francis, as well as their respective tombs under their respective churches. I should note that just before going into the Basilica of St. Francis (which, by the way, is territory of the Vatican), Tim needed to make a pit stop. Our guide noted that he would need 50 cents to use the public toilets, but none of us had change. As Tim was bouncing nervously around, Chris came up with a full 1 euro coin, which Tim took and raced to the bathroom.

We returned to Rome and took our own walking tour of the Spanish steps, bought gelato (the best deal in all of Rome), and wandered the streets. It was VERY busy on Sunday night and there were many street performers of all types. There was one beautiful basilica/church after another on Via del Corso. This goes to show that the aphorism, “When in Rome, never pass up a basilica or church without looking in” is very true. We were never disappointed.

We were advised to go to dinner at Gabriello’s on Via Vittoria. We walked up and down the 150 yard street with people repeatedly telling us, “It’s just down the street.” Finally, another restaurant manager walked us to the door of Gabriello’s only to read a sign on the door that said it was closed for repairs. We ended up with dinner at Don Chischiotte (Don Quixote), which was off the beaten path. RECOMMENDATION: eating at restaurants off the beaten path is considerably cheaper and quite often better food.

We walked about 1 mile to get back to our hotel where we retired after a little recapping of the day.

The Religious Experience and the Idea

Saturday, September 5, 2015

It all starts with the Saysanas, who were traveling separately from the Lawsons and the Rubergs (as is their usual protocol). Their plane was delayed out of Indianapolis; then they just barely made their connection, only to find out that there were mechanical difficulties and they had to change planes, which created further delays. [Note: from the Lawsons and Rubergs perspectives, the benefits of NOT traveling on the same airlines as the Saysanas continue to pile up.] Despite their difficulties and the smooth airline travel by Lawsons and Rubergs, in the end we arrived in Rome at approximately the same time.

We are staying at the Rose Garden Palace, which is slightly ironic since they have no rose garden, and in fact, no roses at all. It is right across the street from the US Embassy for those of you familiar with Rome city geography. Interestingly, next to our hotel is the Jackie O Ristorante. We are trying to figure out who it is named for (we will get back to you on that when we find out).

After getting settled in our very nice hotel, our main activity consisted of a walk to see the second largest Basilica in Rome, Santa Maria Maggiore. Along the way there were many fountains and churches (900 churches in Rome, and of course, Rome is The City of Fountains). The Basilica was grand (perhaps one of the widest facades of any cathedral Steve has ever seen).

In front of the Basilica we saw what you will never see in the US – armed guards! Inside of the Basilica, perhaps the most striking first observation is the incredibly ornate ceiling with gold gilded paint on floral features. Of course, there are stained glass windows, paintings and mosaics decorating EVERY inch of wall space. The baptistery (off to the back right of the Basilica) was a very large room with a baptismal font of pure bronze the size of two large bathtubs.

We were not allowed in the side chapels (they were gated closed), but the vaulted ceilings that could be seen were decorated with the most amazing ceiling paintings. One was Mary ascending into heaven, and the painted sky was so realistic that it looked like there was no ceiling.

As divine intervention would have it (some call it luck), there was a Saturday evening Mass was happening shortly after we were done walking through the Basilica (6PM). Steve and Debbie decided to attend Mass (what else are Catholics supposed to do in Rome?) while the others decided to go across the street and break bread and drink wine at the café. It should be noted that it was a religious experience for both groups.

We left the Basilica area to walk back to our hotel with the desire to find a nice restaurant along the way for dinner. As we walked, we were most fortunate to stumble across the Istituto Nazionale di Statistica. For those not fluent in English or having any common sense, this translates into the National Institute for Statistics – alas, Steve felt right at home.

We ended up at a wonderful outdoor restaurant called Ristorante Strega. When we asked for a table for six, the waiter there asked if we were Americans. Upon responding in the affirmative, we were quickly ushered to the back of the outdoor seating area where we had a table to ourselves away from the madding crowd. We debated whether we were given this special table because of their fear of the “ugly Americans” or out of respect for the greatest country on earth. Hmmm. We will let the reader decide. By the way, “strega” in Italian means “witch,” and we never figured out why it had such a name. Alas, another restaurant name we will have to get back to you on.

Lastly, throughout the flight to Rome and during our walks and dinner, Tim had a brilliant idea. [Be prepared … get a load of this.] Tim thinks that Steve should give a lecture to the commoners at Old Oakland (sometimes known as the Saturday Noon Golf Group) on the joys, fun and mystery of statistics – you know … all those ‘cool’ things Steve knows that no one else does. Now, Steve is flattered and enamored by the idea to be sure, and he swears he could smother everyone with cleverness. However, a test run of the idea by others in the group brought the following reactions:

              Chan: He better be buying drinks … I mean lots of drinks;

              Michelle: I am busy that night;

              Chris: What?;

              Debbie: Tim, don’t encourage him.

So there you have it. I will let the Saturday Noon Golf Group decide.

And with that, we retired for the evening.

[PS:  Pictures to follow when I can upload them.]